Stuff Cub Scouts Taught Me

For those that don't know, I am a 'Den Mother' for the Bear Cubs in my ward. This week's den meeting came in handy for me so I thought I would share it with you.

This week we talked about being resourceful. Meaning, when you don't have exactly what you need you find alternatives and make it work. As I said, this came in handy today. While cooking dinner this evening I was opening a can of corn and as the lid popped off of the can it cut deeply into my finger. I would probably say this was the deepest cut I have had since my older brother threw a chunk of concrete over an outhouse and clocked me on my head. I needed stitches then, and I probably need them now. BUT....THAT is when being resourceful comes in. Being unemployed I currently don't have health insurance. So I am guessing it would cost a few hundred dollars to go to the hospital and get stitched up. So...following is a quick guide for those 'do it yourselfers' out there. rather than spend $200 to $500 at the hospital, I spent $12.85 at Smith's. You can't get much more resourceful than that!

SUPPLIES

- Super Glue instead of Stitches
- Band Aid - for obvious reasons
- Stretchy, Breathable medical tape - for the splint - I need a splint because every time I bend my finger it opens back up and starts bleeding again.
- Ice-cream bar stick - also for the splint. The good thing about this is you get to eat the ice-cream first!

If you are squeemish don't scroll all the way down. those are the before pictures. If you look closely you'll see a little bit of 'meat' coming out of my finger. But here is the after picture. Not too bad if I say so myself.

Turning 'Father'

A miracle is happening right before my eyes and I would be remiss if I didn’t take the time to appreciate it.

When I was six I looked up to the boys that were 12 and wondered what it was like to be that age. I was in awe of their size, maturity and, what I considered, the many freedoms they had that we measly six year olds did not. In my mind they were close to being adults and could do almost whatever they wanted. I couldn’t wait to reach that age and experience all the joys of being 12. The grand age of 12 came along and suddenly the charm wasn’t there. I didn’t ‘feel’ 12. I didn’t see myself in the same light I saw the mighty 12 year olds when I was younger. So my aspirations moved to what I considered the next milestone age, 16. Driving, deep voices, puberty and… dating…I guess. I couldn’t imagine a girl wanting to go on a date with me but I figured it would just happen. It seemed to happen to everyone else, right? Not necessarily. Once again turning 16 was not what I thought it would be. I was not necessarily disappointed; I just had an idea of what it was like to be 16 and once I was there the appeal was gone. Maybe 18 was the magic age, or 21. Or maybe 28 is when you really start to feel like an adult. This pattern continued and would still continue if not for Mason. It’s hard for me to believe that I’m 30 years old but I’ve realized something. The appeal I associate with each age we tag as milestones does not come simply because you turned that age. It comes through the experiences you encounter when you reach that age. The reason I didn’t ‘feel’ 12 or 16 or 18 was because I didn’t stop to look at what that really meant.

It still feels very new to me but I’ve been a father for a year now. I am starting to realize what being a father ‘feels’ like. The fact that I’ve been around 30 years does not entitle me to the same label I put on others of that age. I had in my mind a picture of what 30 was like. When I was younger most 30 year old men I knew were fathers, husbands and established in their career. To some degree, being a father and a husband is what makes me 30, if you know what I mean. I look at age differently now. Our experiences define our age and the number is just a quick reference point of what experiences we may have had and what those to come will be. I say all that to say all this.

As I watch Mason grow I often feel it necessary to step back and try to fathom what is actually taking place. Everything I do will, and does, in some way affect not only Mason’s development on many different levels but also the development of our relationship. Not too long ago, thanks to his Mom’s unwavering dedication, Mason began signing a few words. I am absolutely amazed when he looks me dead in the eye and signs. First, the fact that babies can learn to communicate at such a young age astounds me. But what really strikes me is the look he gives me. It is blatantly obvious that there is a purpose behind his signing. He knows he wants milk and he knows that in order to get it he has to first connect with me through my eyes and then communicate the sign. To the more seasoned parents this may seem trivial or absurd but to me it is a miracle I see everyday.

Because of my new philosophy on age I think I finally broke the cycle. Looking on my experiences and my place in life I really do ‘feel’ 30. Not because I’ve turned 30, or because my waist is now bigger than ever before, but because, in many ways, my life is structured the way I thought the life of a 30 year old would be structured.

I haven’t ‘turned’ 30, I’ve ‘turned’ father, I’ve ‘turned’ husband. The age of 30 is only connected to how long I’ve been around not who I am and the miracles I see in my life everyday.

Your potential

I remember sitting on a big queen sized bed listening to my Dad read Hemingway's 'The Old Man and the Sea'. Their room was always immaculate. An example of discipline that may not have transferred to me the way my parents expected it to. I could see the perfect, symmetrical patterns in the carpet left behind by the vacuum. The faint smell of my Mom's perfume and my Dad's cologne hung in the air. My sister and I were young and had too much energy to sit and listen to a book about an old man. It felt like it was important to my parents though, so we listened anyway. To me, the book's redeeming qualities were its inclusion of fishing and a young boy, to whom I tried to relate. In the beginning I was doing, what I thought was, a favor for my parents. I was listening because they wanted me too. I was listening, but I wasn't hearing. As the story developed, however, it seemed to surround my mind like a moat keeping all other thoughts, visions and emotions from entering. My fascination with the story and it's characters swelled like a dry sponge dipped in water. At my young age I didn't fully appreciate what I was hearing. But I was interested in the story and I guess, at the time, that was enough. I won't ruin it for those of you who have not read the book, but it did not end the way I thought it would. In fact, it didn't end the way I wanted it to. I could probably extract more valuable lessons from the book now than I did then. I think I'll give it another read.

I can't say for sure if that experience is the root of my fledgling interest in literature. I like to think so. It is, however, one of my most memorable and cherished childhood experiences. I'm in awe of how words on a page created such lucid visuals that linger today each time I think of that story. Especially since I can scarcely remember what I had for lunch the previous day.

Mark Twain said "The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them."

When I first heard this quote it slipped through my thoughts like a wet noodle off a dinner fork. It later returned, along with numerous other items rattling around up there, but this time was different. It stopped all other thoughts like a fish hook stops a trout. I wondered why it hadn't hit me like this the first time. I suppose I'm lucky it did the second.

I guess it's a simple quote that's easy to understand. I guess its simplicity is the reason it flew by without notice. I guess anyone could think on it a while and conjure up some brilliant life lessons and thoughts. But I felt like recording a few of my own.

Authors like Twain, Orwell, Dickens, Hemingway and other skillful wordsmiths had an uncanny ability to communicate, influence and entertain. I'm told reading and writing is the best way to learn to write. Admittedly, I lack the discipline to do both more often because mindlessly watching television is much easier. Does it seem like TV ruined society's ability to produce talented authors like the classic writers before television? As it is with many things in life, we do not fully reap the benefits great literature offers. Feelings of hypocrisy make it difficult to write this, but literature should be a staple of our intellectual diet. I often wonder if I would be a better speaker, writer and communicator had I given literature more importance earlier in my life.

Mark Twain's quote relates to reading "good books", but the same can be said for other abilities and opportunities we undervalue. Noticing only the strengths, possessions, attributes and blessings others have that we do not blinds us from noticing our own. Mr. Twain has instilled in me a renewed urgency in exploring the many opportunities available to me and harvesting from them the most that I can.

Many of us are commonly asked "What is your greatest fear?” A long time ago I thought about that question and realized that my greatest fear is not living up to my potential. What a tragedy it would be if none of us did? What kind of life would we live or world would it be if all of us did?

Gordon B. Hinckley

Gordon B. Hinckley was truly a Man of God.



When Kim and I heard of Pres. Hinckley's passing there was a deafening silence in the room followed by a few sniffles and a few tears. My first reaction was to feel selfishly sad. Then I realized that it was his time to Return With Honor. It's hard to imagine a church, or a world, without him. I was always excited to watch any talk he gave and strive to better follow his example and put his teachings into practice. His speeches were very simple and encouraging, direct and piercing yet always full of love. After hearing him speak I would always walk away with a higher sense of purpose and a renewed vigor for personal and spiritual progress. It's very easy to call a man like that a Prophet.

He was the Prophet for most of my adult life so as my testimony grew so grew my love and respect for him and his calling. In my opinion, what he has done for the church as a modern day Prophet is second only to Joseph Smith. I know it was time for him to go, but it's a shame Mason will never have the opportunities to listen to him that I had. I wish he could have stayed another 20 years so Mason could learn from him like I did.

I'm excited for the years ahead. I have always looked up to President Monson, and now I can say that I've actually shaken the hand of a living Prophet. He is another speaker you don't want to miss listening to. Many people say that he has big shoes to fill. I don't think you can fill President Hinckley's shoes. I think those will be set aside and President Monson will not replace President Hinckley, but fill the position in his unique way.

"Forget yourself and go to work"

Another 07 review?

I guess it's that time of year again to take an intro and retrospective look at yourself and how the last year has treated you. In the words of my copywriter, last year treated me 'like a baby treats a diaper'. Ok, it wasn't that bad. He said that one day after I asked how the golf courses are treating him this year and I'll never forget it. He is a hilarious king of one liners and I just had to throw that in there.

Anyway, 2007 was a good one. I am horrible at keeping a journal or remembering all of the events throughout the year but here is a quick rundown of my (our) 2007.

Best day of the year:
>The birth of Mason - 1/22/07

Scariest day of the year:
>Day after birth of Mason - reality set in and I was officially a father.

Worst day of the year:
>My 30th birthday - I've always been indifferent about birthdays, but this one was different. The big 3-0 felt like a giant police car spotlight waking me from a deep sleep.

Saddest day of the year:
>Every Monday that's not a holiday

Biggest events:
>Birth of Mason
>Kim's new home business - selling children's books, www.ubah.com/s2447
>My new job

Things I'll miss:
>Holding Mason as an infant
>My 32 inch waist - hopefully I'll get that back this year but then again.....as you know I'm 30 now. I'm not holding my breath.
>My childhood home in Sandy - Grandma and Grandpa decided to move to Ogden where they can be closer to their favorite child - Steve.

Things I won't miss:
>USU Football - I can't wait for the season to start, but we gotta have a better year
>3 a.m. feedings

Best Movies:
>Ocean's 13
>Borne Ultimatum

2007 Stats:
>Babies - 1
>Diapers - 1,825
>Baby Bottles - 960
>Baby Food - 540 containers
>Dates with Kim - About half as many as 2006
>Pounds gained - Don't want to talk about it
>Smiles - Many more with Mason in our lives

Overall this has been a great year. On my 30th birthday I think my Dad could tell I was a little down about it. He brought me back to reality by reminding me that I have a beautiful wife and healthy son, a good job, a roof over my head and the love of everyone around me. That sums up '07 quite well. He is a wise man.

Happy New Year.

Who took the Christ out of Christmas?

So it's Christmas Eve and I'm in an Idaho blizzard right now. I tried to go get one final present for Kim, but after fighting traffic in this snow I turned right around and came back. This will definitely be a white Christmas.

Christmas is an interesting time of year. There are numerous traditions we all love to follow. But at the same time, unless those traditions help us remember the true meaning of Christmas, I wonder how important they really are. It is so easy to get caught up in the gift giving and receiving. I, for one, love receiving gifts from others. I wish, however, I was better at remembering what this season is all about. I struggle with keeping the 'True Meaning of Christmas' top of mind. Leave it to this very imperfect society to turn the birth of Christ into a time of year when we all shop, spend and eat beyond our limits.

I need to talk to Kim about this (and I know this is cliche) but I would like to start traditions in my own little family that are more centered around Christ, his birth, and service. I feel like I need to do this more for me than for Kim and Mason so hopefully she'll humor me on this one. Kim is so Christlike that I don't think she ever needs a reminder about what this season is about.

I know of one person that reads this blog (Marianne) but hopefully as my readership grows the rest of you can give some ideas. Marianne, do you guys have any traditions like this? I want to do stuff like feed the homeless, give to charity and serve some of our neighbors that may be less fortunate. What about traditions that you can do throughout the holiday season to give us a reality check put Christ back into Christmas? Any ideas y'all have would be great.

Merry CHRISTmas!!

I took the job

Cicero wrote 'We must not say every mistake is a foolish one'.

I'm of course hoping this decision was not a mistake, but if down the road I find out it was I hope I can say it wasn't a foolish one. About 2 months ago I got an email from the VP of Client Services at Rastar www.rastar.com. I am familiar with Rastar because there have been times when I would join my clients at Rastar's print shop to do press checks for their direct mail creative. At the time I thought they only did print production. For example, Sundance hired them to print the 100+ page brochure they sold at the Sundance Film Festival. Anyway, it turns out that they now have a division that is similar to Datamark's client services division. Their clientele is different but it's the same type of marketing and advertising. The email said that they would like to interview me for a position. Something like this has never happened to me so I was a little taken aback. 'Where are the cameras' right? Who's punking me? I wrote back and found out that it was legit. Julie, from Rastar, saw my resume on Monster.com and asked me to interview for the position. The following Thursday I interviewed, the next day I interviewed again and then was told to wait until they were able to figure out some HR issues. For the following 2 months Julie and I traded emails. I didn't want this opportunity to pass me by so I wrote her about every week. Finally, Julie said that she would like to interview me again and the following day they offered me the job.

This has been one of the hardest decision I've ever had to make. Datamark wasn't always the best place to work but over the past 8 months things have changed. My supervisor is truly looking out for my best interests and he has found ways to give me more responsibility to prove my worth. Datamark is moving in a better direction and doing what they can to make it a better place to work. I gotta say, they are trying, but if they don't start increasing salaries more people will be lured away like I was.

In a way I feel like I'm betraying my supervisor but hopefully he understands why I'm doing this. So far I feel like this is the right decision, but only time will tell.